You might pity him but my credit card theft resulted in over $10K of charges and a huge hassle and expense for several years. My card never left my hands, it was a stolen number only.

Word of warning, be sure you put a fraud alert on all your credit cards and start checking your credit report yearly, you are now likely to be at significant risk for identity theft and that can cost you thousands of dollars in time and hassle clearing your name and fixing the problems.

I say the felony charge is barely enough and I hope that if guilty the judge will sentence him harshly.

I think I would feel the same way if I was in your situation.
But I also think that you can go, state the facts of what happened (which is all they are asking you to do in court) with the hope in your heart that he has learned (or will learn) from the mistake he made.
I think it's safe to say you learned from the experience, too.

Your compassion and forgiveness is admirable, but I'm reminded of the saying, "Be resonsible for what you say and do." He wasn't using your credit card at a grocery store to buy food for his children, but at Best Buy. Certainly nothing wrong with trying to teach your children sympathy and compassion ( "Blessed are the Merciful"). Although, perhaps in this case, it is more an example of consequences for wrong choices.

I grew up in a poor town. My family was poor. You can be poor and still know right from wrong. I feel sorry for this person's situation, but he certainly didn't make a choice that will improve his life.

This person knows right from wrong. He knew stealing your card was wrong and he just tested it out to see how far he could get then was all set and read to make a large purchase from Best Buy. Criminals are not dumb they are very smart. This is why I have a fraud alert on my credit report and watch it monthly with TrueCredit as well as LifeLock (for my son and I). If you don't watch out for yourself no one will.

I understand her feelings. It tells alot about where her heart is. She doesn't want vengance. My guess if she were asked, she would rather see his restoration to a better life. I commend her.

Like Oogie M, I recently was a victim of someone stealing my credit card number only. I lost $700 which was returned by the bank, but the inconvenience of it all is worth much more than the $700 charged to my card. As Christians, we are supposed to forgive, but God tells us that even when we are forgiven, there are consequences for our actions. I say, show up in court, state what happened, and then if you truly feel this way, ask the court to show leniency. Maybe that will touch the guy's heart and, even if convicted, he will think twice before doing a similar crime again. And by the way, don't leave your credit card in your car anymore!

I have been the victim of credit card fraud and theft five times in the last three years, and only one instance had any sort of organized crime link. The others were, like your case, just stupid kids. They had drug problems or boyfriends who talked them into making copies of customers' credit cards. My thefts happened in an area with a booming economy, and I think these kids feel like losers and want to feel like bigshots for a while.

It would be easy to say that their parents or school or church should have taught them better, but I suspect these are kids with few positive influences in their lives.

Would I go to court if asked? Yes, but I'd make a point in the courtroom of asking how the accused will be able to change so it won't happen again.

Several years ago, my home was broken in to. Fortunatley, my neighbor saw the vehicle and gave a description to the police. The man was later caught. Much to my surprise, he was someone I knew! I had hired him the year before to paint the exterior of my home. I pressed charges anyway. As it turns out, this young man was a crack addict and burglarized homes in order to sell the merchandise and buy mroe drugs. He expressed remorse, but I knew he needed to suffer the consequence for his crime. If I had decided not to press charges, he only would have continued his life of crime, drugs, etc. He was sentenced to 4 years in the state prison.

I felt similarly after getting mugged - the emotional trauma, physical aftermath and mess of sorting out the details of a loss that included multiple credit cards, my checkbook, my cellphone and more did not outweigh my pity for someone who I assumed was desperate for some money....for food or maybe some basic needs that I imagine are a struggle for folks in the poor neighborhood near my house. I felt pity until I learned that he used my cellphone to access sex phone lines.

It's fine to feel pity for someone who is desperate enough to steal in order to survive. But Dunkin donuts and Electronics from Best Buy are not exactly necessities. The guy's a thief, plain and simple.

I was robbed a couple years ago..actually my purse was taken from me as I was walking to work. I think I would want to see the guy, just to make sure he was actually going to jail. I don't think they ever caught the guy who knocked me off my feet while trying to grab my purse.

If you feel sorry for the disadvantaged, do something positive, like volunteer at the local shelter or soup kitchen or donate to the local food shelf. Do NOT encourage illegal activity, even passively, by failing to aid law enforcement. What kind of example are you showing your children?

I'd recommend transferring your pity to someone who really could use it. You know nothing about the person who stole your card, yet you ascribe attributes, motivations, and excuses for him. It isn't your job to judge the merits of the case made against him. Compassion is the domain of the judge if the individual is tried and convicted of the crime, and his circumstances warrant pity or compassion. Your job as a crime victim is to tell what happened in a truthful fashion without editorializing and to have faith in our laws and constitution. I am a psychologist who has worked with juvenile offenders for 15 years. The right thing to do is to let the justice system work.

Something you didn't consider: what would have happened if you happened to come upon him as he was doing his crime. It might not have worked out so well for you if it turned violent. You never know to what depths a criminal - and he is a criminal - will go to if confronted.

I understand what you are saying, however, I feel if the consequences were as you said greater for you, you might feel differently. If the young man in question was so poor that he didn't have the funds for even a doughnut you might be inclined to give it to him if you were given the opportunity. Or was this young man just stupid enough to use the card for whatever he wanted, if he had gone to Best Buy first and charged hundreds of dollars that you ended up responsible for, how would you feel.
A few years ago I had an intruder in my home (he broke in the back door @ 2:00 am) while my son and I were asleep. Luckily my 12 yr old son didn't wake up and I pretended to be asleep. He took jewelry and lots of electrical equipment. The police never caught him, but if they had I would have liked to have been there to know he was prosecuted and paid for his crime. I suppose you won't really know until you get there. Good Luck.

I understand what you are saying, however, I feel if the consequences were as you said greater for you, you might feel differently. If the young man in question was so poor that he didn't have the funds for even a doughnut you might be inclined to give it to him if you were given the opportunity. Or was this young man just stupid enough to use the card for whatever he wanted, if he had gone to Best Buy first and charged hundreds of dollars that you ended up responsible for, how would you feel.
A few years ago I had an intruder in my home (he broke in the back door @ 2:00 am) while my son and I were asleep. Luckily my 12 yr old son didn't wake up and I pretended to be asleep. He took jewelry and lots of electrical equipment. The police never caught him, but if they had I would have liked to have been there to know he was prosecuted and paid for his crime. I suppose you won't really know until you get there. Good Luck.

I would only feel sorry for this person if they were using it to buy food or medicine for a sick loved one that they couldn't afford themselves - last time I checked Best Buy doesn't have a grocery section, pharmacy or hospital in it.

You shouldn't feel sorry for him. The guy is clearly a professional. How do I know? I did credit card fraud investigations for 5 years, while in grad school. He made a tiny purchase first to make sure you hadn't reported the card. Then he went to an electronics store with the full intention of maxing out the card.

This is an individual who does not feel sorry for you. He thinks you are a chump! He also has a ridiculous sense of entitlement. He does not believe in earning an honest living.

By testifying honestly, you will be sending a career criminal to prison and keeping him from commiting more crime.

Make no mistake, credit card fraud costs EVERYONE of us.

Although you feel pity, you need to appear. If you don't, you will always wonder and start looking at faces and wonder "what makes a person do that" and speculating. Remember, if he did it to you, he did it to someone else and will continue unless you help him understand that there are consequences for his actions (which is a lesson he wasn't taught before).

We all go through difficult times and make due but usually we don't "steal". Credit card theft doesn't just affect now, it may affect the victim's future especially if he had charged large purchases and you didn't know for some time and he ruined your credit. Bad credit (even in theft) can prevent employment, loans, etc.

It takes all of us to stop crime, even "petty crime" which evolves to larger crimes.

I have rarely read anything as self-centered and unaware as this story. Luckily for all of us, we have a system of law that does not depend on whether or not certain criminals are worthy of the pity of people like the author. Crimes such as these affect all of us in the form of increased insurance and credit card fees, quite apart from what studies have demonstrated is a connection between the "gateway" crime described and more serious offenses. This is why public prosecutors bring criminal cases. How frustrating for the police, prosecutors, judges, social workers, and corrections officials who work hard in the criminal justice system to have to cope with people like the author, who insist on participating only when they personally see some reason to do so. I'm glad I live somewhere else!

I would want to see the guy again. You are very lucky you only were taken for $1.83 and that this individual was not violent toward you (that he stole it out of your car). Had he charged $500 or more you might not feel sorry for him. Scum like him should go to jail before he has the opportunity to steal a credit card from someone else and do more damage to another. Identity theft is on the rise and you were a victim. Wake up, sister! Face the guy and tell him that he did the crime and now should do the time.

I completely know how you feel. Several years ago I was a victim of a man that exposed himself to me. I filed a report with the police and within a couple of days he was caught. I had to appear in court to testify against him and when he was convicted, like you, I felt nothing but pity for him. Everybody kept telling me that I must be feeling pretty good to have gotten him convicted, but I only felt sorrow. In the end, of course I am glad that he was caught. Who knows how much further he could have taken it with somebody else, plus what he did was wrong. I suppose what we feel sorry for is a person that resorts to such acts. It is a sad exsistence!

I understand why you would feel sorry for the person, however, if you can find a job (no matter what it is as long as it's legal) than he can find one also.

Ignorance is no longer an excuse. If the alleged criminal can put that much effort into stealing then they can put that much effort into a job search.