There’s a Sinkhole in My Head

Illustration of Multitasking by Christopher Silas Neal

We’ve all been thinking a lot about sinkholes this week, because of everything that’s happening in Florida, suddenly the sinkhole capital of the world.  And the more I thought about sinkholes, the more I realized that I have sinkholes all over my life. To wit:

1. Sinkhole next to the phone in the kitchen. That’s where the unsigned, green high school athletic agreements have gone. Oh, plus the order form for spring lacrosse gear that was due today.

2. Sinkhole under the front seat of the car. That’s where the scraper/brush combo thingy is hiding.

3. Sinkhole in the family room. Contains: one remote; two mismatched socks; three empty king-size bags of Twizzlers.

4. Skinkhole in the pantry. Contains: the rest of the black and white cookies my husband bought over the weekend. Although, mysteriously, the package they came in is still there. ???

5. Sinkhole in the little ceramic bowl in the drawer near the car keys. The charming little bowl that I routinely fill with quarters for parking, and that the sinkhole routinely consumes. And then the sinkhole seals back up again!  Tricky.

6. Sinkhole in my son’s backpack. Contains:  his student I.D.; phone charger; Spanish textbook; science bibliography; and a bunch of other stuff I didn’t even know was missing, what with the general Pig-Penness of the whole operation.

And finally:

7.  Sinkhole in my head. This is the really big, really scary one. If I could ever get to the bottom of it, I might find: the name of my fifth grade homeroom teacher; the location of my tennis racket; the note I wrote to myself, reminding me to call the painter; the reason I have so many houseplants; the ability to read in bed without falling asleep. And much, much more.

Next week: there’s quicksand everywhere I look!


  1. microrrelatososhortstories

    Oh yes, I heard about Florida, that happens a lot in Mexico City during the rain season… As I read I thought about it and came to the conclusion that I’ve got a blackhole in my head and many important facts, dates, assignments, names slowly revolve around it, each day getting nearer to the center of nothingness… I need to sit down with a piece of paper, a pencil and a huge amount of silence so rescue all that information from being eaten by the blackhole… :) all the luck with patching up your sinkholes, Alexandra

    March 5, 2013 at 7:03 pm
  2. Megan

    should not be discussing this at this time

    March 5, 2013 at 9:03 pm
  3. shalilah2002

    I have to constantly make notes because of the sinkholes in my head and house. I make lists and lists especially shopping list, a running account of things I need and my household.

    March 5, 2013 at 9:05 pm
  4. suzemagoo

    I trust my sinkholes. If it is a true priority, it’ll grow appendages and crawl out of the hole.

    March 6, 2013 at 6:27 am
  5. Amanda DiBernardo

    I think this is in very poor taste at this time, considering at least one family has lost their home and everything it contained, and a man has lost his life.

    March 6, 2013 at 8:16 am
  6. kristin van ogtrop

    Megan and Amanda, you are absolutely right. In an early draft of this blog, I wrote how sad I felt for the family of the man who disappeared over the weekend. I should have left that sentiment in. My mistake.

    March 6, 2013 at 9:48 am

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