Two Women-Only Wellness Products You Probably DON’T Need

June 30, 2009 | By | Comments (0)

I know I've written about some very wacky "health" products in the past and I've been known to pore through the quirky SkyMall catalog or the Hammacher Schlemmer catalog looking for new candidates like they're the Good Book, so these latest two I've stumbled upon take the cake. They may be REAL and they may be sort of SIMPLE but they don't seem to fit the Real Simple credo, to my mind…

I'll admit that in my current condition (nearing 25 weeks pregnant), the first one has a certain, um, appeal, I'll say…while the second one, no matter how far along I get, I am not sure I can ever get on board with.

The first item seems like an upgrade, redesign, and streamlining of something most women have in their kitchens and may have even thought of re-purposing when on a camping trip or long car ride. Simply put, the Whiz Freedom lets women relieve their bladders in less-than-ideal situations. We've all been there—whatever the quandary, and in many cases we've just grimaced and held it, waiting for a suitable restroom. According to these manufacturers, this product helps you get some relief faster, cleaner, and without much fuss. I haven't tried it yet but I certainly think it's much preferable to this fantastically-named item, which I heard of a few years ago and truly seems unpalatable.

The second item you might think it a Saturday Night Live parody. Or at least I did. I swear—until I spied the Better Business Bureau stamp at the bottom of the site and also surfed around the web a bit to make sure it was for real, I honestly thought this was some sort of joke. In short, the product promises to provide support for your breasts while sleeping. No, not the kind of support you get from wearing a light bra—because, no, that would be too simple!—but another kind. This soft, tubular device goes between the breasts to support one away from the other, lessening the weight and friction. Again, to be fair: I haven't tested the product so I won't slam it any more without having tried it but it first made me giggle, and then made me wonder who was going to fork over $38-$42 dollars for this. Then I really started to roar when I read the comment of one (presumably male) commenter on this site, which highlights new stuff on the web: "I'll provide the same service for free, ladies." Heh.